Jokes........

Prospective Employer to Applicant: " So why did you leave your previous job?"
Applicant: " The company relocated and they did not tell me where!"
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Wife: " Sir, I would like to call on my husband who left me and brought all our five kids wth him."

Radio Host: " Ok, go ahead!"

Wife: " Sweetheart, please return back all the kids, actually only one of them is
yours."
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Hello!
I'm here again. My mind is all muddlled up. I just want to ask something. I know that you will be able to help me out. Is BIRDS FLU the past tense of BIRDS FLY?
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You were riding a bus, when you suddenly fart. Luckily the music is very loud.
Every time you farted, you timed it with the music. When you were going down
the bus, everybody were throwing dagger looks at you, and you suddenly realized . . . . . that you have your MP3 player on your ears !

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WIFE: It's a miracle! You came home early.
HUSBAND: I just obeyed what my boss told me to do. He said: "GO TO HELL", that's why I came home early.

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1st night grandma wore a see-thru dress, grandpa didn't react...
2nd night grandma wore t-back, grandpa still didn't react...
3rd night grandma all naked, grandpa said "what is that you are wearing, it's all
crumpled!!"
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John: it's my wife's birthday
Peter: what's your gift to her?
John: i asked her what she wanted
Peter: what did she said?
John: anything, as long a there is a DIAMOND.
Peter: what did you gave her?
John: playing cards